January
Grey skies, books, and blanket nests.
One of these years I will look at what I pre-planned for myself in January and February and find that, for once, I have already taken into account that what my body and brain most want from the first two months of the year is to hibernate to the best of my ability. This year is not that year but I have, at least, allowed myself to acknowledge the yearnings in slightly better ways than upping my hot chocolate intake and telling myself to get on with it.
So this newletter is coming to you from the depths of the blanket nest I created for myself at the instigation of Melinda Salisbury in the January section of her The Wayback Almanac. This delightful almanac, which contains suggestions for things to read, plant, make and do for each month, is one of four books that I’m reading over the course of the entire year since their chapters follow the seasons. The other three books are Eleanor Parker’s Winters in the World (a journey through the Anglo-Saxon year via medieval poetry, histories and religious literature), Rebecca Beattie’s The Wheel of the Year (a nurturing guide to discovering nature’s seasons and cycles), and Ruth Pavey’s Deeper into the Wood (the follow up to her wonderful A Wood of One’s Own).
I’m reading hard copies of all these books which, given my currently quite nomadic existance, isn’t the easiest way to do it but they are my evening reading; a couple of pages from the relvant chapter of one of them each night after I’ve written in my journal and before I do my evening wind down meditation. Having them seperate from my electronic devices really does make it easier to disconnect and relax. I find this slow and gentle form of “real time reading” not only ensures I take in more of what I’ve read, it also helps me forge a deeper connection with the world as I take what I’ve read the previous evening out with me on my walk the next day.
I will, of course, be reviewing all four books when I finish them but in case you fancy doing the same as me, I’d happily encourage you to pick up any one of them based on what I’ve read so far. As for the books I’ve actually finished during January there’s a blog post here with my review of all 9 of the ones that I rated 3 stars or above.
I haven’t kept a tally of how many days of grey, cold, wet and miserable weather there have been this month but my brain is claiming that three weeks out of four have been appalling. What I can say for certain is that, for someone who doesn’t function if they don’t walk themselves regularly (I often wonder if I was a dog in a previous life), I’ve spent far too many mornings having to force myself into my waterproofs and out into the woods. Plus I’m pretty convinced that if I hadn’t invested in some decent thermals I wouldn’t have properly warmed up all month! I imagine February will bring more of the same but between the afformentioned blanket nest (which gives me somewhere quiet to curl up and recharge when house clearing and/or the world in general becomes too much) and the woods at both of the places I’m zooming between I’m keeping the worst of the seasonal depression at bay.
Speaking of clearing houses … I think it’s a jewish proverb that goes something like “when we make plans, god laughs”. I’d created a schedule for what I wanted to get cleared this month. The schedule ended up bearing absolutely no reflection on reality. I might recycle it for February or I could just put it in the bin. To be honest the second option is far more appealing. It isn’t that progress isn’t being made, it’s that it is happening in increments so tiny I image it would be funny to any omnipotent deity watching. But I refuse to feel defeated. Too early in the year for that. Instead I’m clinging to the facts that a) progress has been made and b) the thing which completely scuppered the schedule has also mostly been dealt with now, so I shall plough onward regardless.
In news that will surprise no-one I have not finished either of the crochet projects I am working on. One is fiddly and requires a lot of concentration, the other is more repetitive but ENORMOUS, and my time with a hook is limited to about half an hour a night. Since both of these are gifts I can’t even show you progress photos so you’ll just have to imagine what they might be and see if you’re right when they’re finally finished. Whenever that might be.
My writing, however, continues to be a balm to my soul and bring me great joy (long may it remain so). Having properly internalised that what I’m writing should first and foremost be for me, and I can worry about what to do with it after I’ve got a first draft, I’ve found it far easier to get words onto the page and to play with ideas again.
After spending the previous two years focussed on getting my work submitted to magazines and competitions, and becoming as inured to rejection as I’m going to get, I made the decision at the start of this year that I would not worry about submitting anything anywhere. This, I told myself, would be the year I wrote solely for myself and no one else and if anything was going to be shared anywhere it would be on my blog. So obviously the first short story I wrote this month got thoroughly edited, went off to two trusted beta readers and then last Friday, after another round of editing, was emailed over to the commissioning editor of an indie press for possible inclusion in their latest anthology.
To be fair to me this was the same call for submissions that I initially tried to write for last November, only instead instead of a short story I ended up with the 10k outline of the Arthurian novel I mentioned in the last newsletter. So I’m calling it tying up the loose ends from last year and not worrying too much about it. Cross your fingers for me, though, because I love the story and I’d love to see it in print.
In terms of writing I’ve shared on my blog, this is what I’ve posted I sent the December newsletter out:
All twelve of the Flashmas tales; the first tale is here and has links through to all the rest.
Flashes of Feathers; my short story/flash project for the year. The master post with a full explanation about what it involves is here and January’s story, titled Lone(ly) Wolf, is here.
And, last but not least, I have drawn a card from my Wildwood tarot to give us some insight into what we might need to think about in February:
When challenges arise, instead of running full tilt towards them yelling defiance, sometimes it is better to move yourself to a holding position that will give you the time and space to review the situation. Then, safe in that place you have chosen to make your stand, you can gather your courage and strength, so that - when the time is right - you can calmly and resolutely deal with it entirely on your own terms.
Until next month, dear subscribers:
May the first buds of new growth put a spring in our steps,
And may the lengthening days brighten our hearts.